The most valuable lesson that I have learnt about Life Coaching is "Who I become". I realised that change is constant and by putting myself in a learning environment, I continue my learning curve and evolve as a better person for myself. The first thing I learnt is to let go of taking care of others at the expense of my own well being.
Women are brought up to nurture, protect and thus unconsciously forget about the fundamental duty of taking care of themselves. It is normal for women to believe that they need to look after others first before oneself. This belief is so strong and entrenched that they do not know how to let go of old beliefs that do not serve the 21st century lifestyles. It's about letting go of the roles of trying to be everything to everyone.
Letting go
Letting go of the roles of mother, wife and daughter is challenging especially when we have been playing these roles for a long period of time. When we become overwhelmed, we become so attached to those roles that we do not know how to engage in other roles anymore. Playing other roles is like losing our "identity". Whatever role we are playing today, ask ourselves, "is this what we stand for?" If we are unhappy, it may be time to rediscover a new "you"! All humans have blind spots and there are patterns and habits. Letting go requires someone to show what are the things that we need "to let go". How to let go? Specifically what do we need to let go first to experience that "sweet spot"? Having let go of disempowering behaviours and beliefs, what can we now replace them with?
Self Love
Some times when I attempt to explain why we need to love ourselves first, some people understood it right away; others will say, "Isn't that selfish?" Self centered? Well, if you do not fill your own cup first, and then go on to fill others, your cup will soon dry up. There will be nothing left to share. Self-love is about paying attention to your own health, fitness, mental, emotional and sense of well being. When you achieve that, people will be inspired by how you take care of yourself and love yourself. They will also want to do the same. Self love is the key to happiness.
My philosophy is "God help those who help themselves." In other words, when you live an inspiring life, others are inspired by your living example. Love yourself first. Self love is the key to happiness.
Dolly Yeo is the chief coach and founder of Mindset Coaching that specialises in life coaching. She is a Results Certified Coach (Australia) and a member of the International Coach Federation, Singapore. She is also an Active Parenting Certified Leader as well as a Certified Parent Facilitator for Parenting Workshops. You can find out more about Dolly Yeo and Mindset Coaching at http://www.mindset-coaching.com or to subscribe to her free newsletters.
Author of "Teenager Parenting 101" http://www.parentingwithdolly.com
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